After Christmas

I'm sorry dear blog followers, for being awol. I havent been able to function you see... and I couldnt take another soul with me. Today I "feel" like talking, however I cannot assemble words. So I will type and see what happens. Never forget Marvelous Mondays ok? I do not, even when I cannot see the forest for the trees. I am grateful a plenty.
I still chose to live, I am still fighting, however it seems too damned hard at times. Sometimes my mind plays tricks on me? I made it through Christmas, and I was proud of my kids who did considerably better than I did. I spent time with my son talking, and told him of my woes. I spent time on the staircase waiting to see him appear for dinner, and he did not. I spent a good deal of time deciding which kid needs me more, the one in the grave, or the ones in the house. I know what youre thinking, but its a difficult decision for me. I jump every 30 minutes? I cannot share those thoughts at all. I spent time with the living, and tried to smile too.....

Ok, lets quit talking shall we? A few pic that I can find so far from Christmas... . Each of us had our hard time, and we each had some good times too. My Poor Aviana had her first root canal, and it was very hard for us all too. All that I can say is, truly.... it was a difficult time, and we ALL tried hard to get through it with a few smiles. Heres a picture of our new baby girls.. Jamie and Emily.............and of course thier mommies:)

Aviana was much stronger than me at the dentist.... One of cooking with Jake, THAT was a good time......The bad time was him telling me that Idaho would be his new home. Far from Mom eh.... gruntMe and my girls, trying???

I have hope for 2009.... Hope, its a good thing.

Seafood Chowder

My original Christmas Clam Chowder has garlic & bacon, and only the clams for seafood's.... and was the favorite part of dinner for my James.
God, I'll miss him so. My minds eye sees him as a boy learning to eat it properly per my request...no slurping allowed. "Little ships go out to sea, I then bring them back to me".
As a teen....battling his brothers at the table to empty the soup Turin every year. As a grown man, helping me in the kitchen by sampling as much as he could get away with. Oh Ow.
Last year I made THIS recipe, he loved it too.. but of course whined for me too "PUT IT BACK". Meaning my original menu item. I will post it for you when I find it in my cookbook. Maybe I can locate a picture too.

THIS one really is so fantastic that you will be humming!I may have posted this last year, but honestly, I cant remember?

Recipe sent to me by request from Chef Jean-Yves Dugue at the Fairmont Hotel in Mont Tremblant, Quebec. Blima and I dined there a few years ago and I wouldnt leave without the recipe. :::I have been known to be a little demanding at times?::: Enjoy!

Seafood Chowder (serves 4)


Ingredients:

3 Tablespoons of butter
3 tablespoons flour
1 liter of fish stock (I use bottled clam juice)
½ cup diced onions
½ cup celery
½ cup potatoes (I use Yukon Gold)
½ cup carrots
½ cup diced salmon
½ cup diced scallops
½ cup baby shrimps (NOT BAY)
½ cup mussels
½ cup clams
½ cup of cream (35%)
Salt and pepper to taste


1. Sauté all vegetables in butter
2. Add the flour and cook down 4 minutes, stir.
3. Add fish stock and cook 20 minutes until vegetables are cooked thoroughly
4. Add all seafood’s and cook 4 minutes
5. Add cream and seasonings


* I increase this x 3 for Christmas, it is perfect.

Beach Weather?

Ice cubed sized hail which has remained since last evening in piles! I am pondering if the poor pelicans and sealions were being pelleted by this!( I pondered this from the deck, looking at the beach, being pellted myself by hail!)

My Poor Car!!

Its low 30's today, but expected to CLIMB? to the 50 mark??? SHEESH... Its snowing and sticking not 20 miles from me over the hill!!!

My machine has been pissy for an hour before it dawned on me that she is cold tooo!!!! So I made another cuppa, I'm letting her run to warm up. I considered nuking some warm oil for her, but decided that it may be over the top even for me.

So I'm going to make make miles of binding and enjoy sitting by the heater doing it.... with a fresh cuppa my new fav coffee....."Darned Good Coffee". ( SLO coffee co)

People Notice

What do people notice about you? A quick assesment.
Walt says (on several occasions) he left his wife in Hawaii. I say he is sorely mistaken. A changed life maybe, a search for where the heck did I leave normal? Maybe even displaced, a square peg in a round hole. But gone? No. Left behind? No. I'm still me. The same person with the same goals, dreams, drive, and traits. I have no different opinions on any subjects.. so why am I different? I dont think that I am. I am simply sad, with a great deal of stress on the side. Thats all. How many changes I ask you.. can one person endure in such a short amount of time? It doesnt mean that person has changed. Just whats around them maybe? In fact... someone once said..."People dont ever change". Is this true? Hmmmmm
Maybe I just need a cuppa familiar, cuppa normalcy...... and I'll call ya in the morning. Enough pondering, theres quilts to be quilted!
So what do peoples notice about you? Go on... try it.
Your sense of humor? Your passion for teaching? Your love of quilting? How about your love of playing in the dirt gardening? A beaming smile? Whats first? Quick? Non analizing, no pondering needed. Unless you're me...lol Happy Tuesday, make it a good day :)

Happy Birthday Heather! - M & M's

Belated by a day, because I am not in tune with life. GRUNT. I hope you had a wonderful day, and yes, Sunday IS better for a birthday than Monday, so Im sure they loved you up a bunch! I miss you. I miss celebrating with you.ANd of course I have somepin for you...lol I just didnt know what day it was?


Marvelous Mondays mean gratefulness for........

The day that Heather was born


Her devotion & friendship


Her love for craftiness


Her flattery of imitation


Her exceptional photography skills


Her baby Sarah


Her ever growing domestic skills:)





Thank You Joan, Mother of Heather... for sending this woman to me, and mine, and hers!

I'm STILL After this!

It's good to know one thing remains the same in my life. My desire to NAB this prize! Either one, I dont care...
I darn near wrecked the car as I was zooming down the hill this morning to deliver christmas quilts. I said OH YES I REALLY DID SEE THAT DIDNT I?
SIGH:::: I could do so much for so many... It would be so heart warming to really be Mrs Claus eh?
Tonight is the Mega Million, 207... 7 winners, 7 states combined.. I havent a shot in the dark to be that little engine that could... Or do I?
Tomorrow night is the California state Lotto.. My chances are greater, I know. Man oh man... So as I sit here trying to get warm with a chicken pot pie.. staring at my wonky memory quilt I have been battling all day...thinkin......
What would YOU do with just a lil bit of this??
After tending well to my parents and children, I think I would have a blast with several sets of keys.. all packaged separately, jingling in a golden box with a silver bow. What do those keys go to you ask? Ahhhh, I knew you would, but doncha know me by now?
Homes people! Homes! The safe sanctuary that we all need. How wonderful would it feel to have that ownership? Security blanket? It would feel like all else in life is truly possibly, and if not...if they fall... they surely have a safe landing:) And , of course, its near G!!! ( had to throw that in there)

I cant wait for that show to begin about the secret millionaires helping to give people homes. Have you seen the commercials? Now THAT'S gotta feel good huh? Giving the security of a home. Nothing elaborate, of course. Modest, and more importantly... its who is under the roof, not what the roof looks like. I saw on the news last evening where homeless people are using "squatters rights" in homes that had been foreclosed on. That was just heartbreaking. Both for the family who lost their home, and for those living on borrowed time, in fear, but have a roof over their head. While I was visiting in the valley for Thanksgiving Heather took me to a once beautiful million dollar property, vandalized, marked up , beaten up.. and it haunts me even now just wondering about the history of the family there.
So, How about you? any plans.....IF?

Good luck to.........................US! Thanks for lunch, good to chat ya.. finally...

Tuna Anyone?

Walt and I strolled the Embarcadero and enjoyed watching " The Daily Catch". Our fisherman friends were kind enough to give us a few pounds too! :::like 10!!!:::( whos coming over, wow, thats a lot!)

I miss that whos coming over thing, I tell ya...

We managed to sneak in some free food for the Moochers. They gotta eat too right? The gruffy dudes said that feeding them was illegal. I dont think I believe that, however I did sprint for the car when I noticed the fish n game guy rounding the park corner.

I had a great shot at a BILL full of tuna, but it would gross ya out...lol Blima, I tried to rope and tie this pelican to send to you, but he only wanted my fish:(....I'll find ya one tho!

We stinked so bad when we got back home that we had to strip at the washing machine... smellyyyyyyy

I must admit that blogging is difficult as I believe in positive positiveness...lol I cant find much lately. I do try, I really do. I still say that things havent gotten easier with time, they have only worsened. Or is it just the season? Or is it life stresses/changes in general? Who knows...but I'm worried about me.

Armenian Cracker Bread Rolls

It must be the week for recipes? I have had also emails for my crackerbread recipe... this is a PITA and WORTH it for "gatherings", and pairs well with wine:::WINK:::

Enjoy

Armenian Cracker Bread rolls

1 3/pack of Armenian cracker bread ( Lavosh) pizza shaped giant cracker


BLEND TOGETHER, SET ASIDE:

2 8 ounce pkgs of softened creamed cheese
1/3 cup mayonnaise


Soak a large bath towel in hot water, wring out and spread on countertop. Under running hot tap water wet both sides of a cracker bread and place on hot wet towel. Cover and leave untouched for about an hour.
Taking one out at a time spread 1/3 of your creamed cheese mixture evenly around your cracker.

Add to each in layers as if you were making a pizza.

1 package of deli ham, deli roast beef, salami, or thin turkey…keyword is THIN.

1 cup of green onions finely chopped

1 cup shredded cheese ( your choice of kind)

1 cup diced tomatoes


Really you can experiment with your ingredients, I have used
Sliced black olives
Sliced Red onion
Sliced Mushroom
Diced red pepper

fresh spinach
Sprouts
Thinly sliced cucumbers ( I love this crunch)
Sliced Avocado ( tip: make only one roll of this as they go brown quickly)

Just start with your meat, cheese, add what you like after that. I like to make different "groupings" of flavors. When finished, Starting from one end begin to roll tightly like a burrito. Cover with plastic wrap and twist ends tightly. Refrigerate several hours or overnight. When ready to serve, slice in 1-1/2 inch cuts with a serrated knife. Keyword: SERRATED knife.

Dianah's Request For Discoveries

For Dianah......
To participate just copy and paste in your own blog, and bold all of the things you have done. Let me know if you participated by leaving a comment! Happy discoveries!
Hey Di, If this is anything like a bucket list, I need to re-make one!

1. Started your own blog=and so it goes...................
2. Slept under the stars= beachable
3. Played in a band= i sang, they played, I was serious.
4. Visited Hawaii=sigh
5. Watched a meteor shower
6. Given more than you can afford to charity
7. Been to Disneyland
8. Climbed a mountain= do it daily
9. Held a preying mantis
10. Sang a solo
11. Bungee jumped
12. Visited Paris
13. Watched a lightning storm at sea
14. Taught yourself an art from scratch
15. Adopted a child
16. Had food poisioning
17. Walked to the top of the Statue of Liberty
18. Grown your own vegetables= tip: always run from worms
19. Seen the Mona Lisa in France
20. Slept on an overnight train
21. Had a pillow fight
22. Hitch hiked
23. Taken a sick day when you're not ill
24. Built a snow fort
25. Held a lamb
26. Gone skinny dipping
27. Run a Marathon=drinkers club with a runnin problem
28. Ridden in a gondola in Venice ( does Las vegas count?)
29. Seen a total eclipse
30. Watched a sunrise or sunset=both
31. Hit a home run
32. Been on a cruise
33. Seen Niagara Falls in person=waving too my Sensi!!
34. Visited the birthplace of your ancestors= need Italy now! Bli!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
35. Seen an Amish community= I make Amish errors?
36. Taught yourself a new language= I speak parrot?
37. Had enough money to be truly satisfied= u think donald trump is truly satisfied?
38. Seen the Leaning Tower of Pisa in person
39. Gone rock climbing= my idea of a jewelery heist.
40. Seen Michelangelo’s David
41. Sung karaoke= poor patrons
42. Seen Old Faithful geyser erupt
43. Bought a stranger a meal at a restaurant=still think of them fondly
44. Visited Africa
45. Walked on a beach by moonlight=unbeatable
46. Been transported in an ambulance= morphine is scary
47. Had your portrait painted
48. Gone deep sea fishing= with my isotoner red gloves
49. Seen the Sistine Chapel in person
50. Been to the top of the Eiffel Tower in Paris
51. Gone scuba diving or snorkeling
52. Kissed in the rain
53. Played in the mud
54. Gone to a drive-in theater, its here in SLO!!!
55. Been in a movie
56. Visited the Great Wall of China
57. Started a business
58. Taken a martial arts class
59. Visited Russia
60. Served in a Soup Kitchen
61. Sold Girl Scout Cookies
62. Gone whale watching
63. Got flowers for no reason
64. Donated blood, platelets, or plasma
65. Gone sky diving
66. Visited a Nazi Concentration Camp= does Schindlers List watching count?
67. Bounced a check= which time?
68. Flown in a helicopter
69. Saved a favorite childhood toy
70. Visited the Lincoln Memorial
71. Eaten Caviar
72. Pieced a quilt= hello???
73. Stood in Time Square= danced by myself in times square woohoo!!
74. Toured the Everglades
75. Been fired from a job
76. Seen the Changing of the Guards in London
77. Broken a bone=not to mention a heart
78. Been on a speeding motorcycle= & broke my wrist, see question above!!
79. Seen the Grand Canyon in Person
80. Published a book= does almost count in more than horseshes?
81. Visited the Vatican
82. Bought a brand new car
83. Walked in Jerusalem
84. Had your picture in the newspaper
85. Read the entire Bible
86. Visited the White House
87. Killed and prepared an animal for eating
88. Had chickenpox
89. Saved someone’s life= depends on who you ask I suppose?
90. Sat on a jury
91. Met someone famous= Walter Matheau
92. Joined a book club
93. Lost a loved one
94. Had a baby= or 4
95. Seen the Alamo in person
96. Swam in the Great Salt Lake
97. Been involved in a law suit
98. Owned a cell phone
99. Been stung by a bee

Does anyone wonder what or "if" there was a 100 question?

Rasberry Cheescake Biscotti

Several requests for this recipe, enjoy!

I wish that I had a picture, maybe Blima has one, I ate all of them! Grunt.

Raspberry Cheesecake Biscotti
tastes like cheesecake in a crisp cookie stick.

Cream Cheese Layer:
1 cup cream cheese
1 egg
1/4 cup granulated sugar
1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract

Biscotti Dough:
1/2 cup melted unsalted butter or oil 1/2 cup vegetable oil
1 1/2 cups granulated sugar
3 eggs
2 teaspoons pure vanilla extract
1/2 teaspoon finely grated lemon peel
1/2 teaspoon almond extract,
optional 1 cup ground almonds, (optional my ass, put them in there!)
3 cups, or more, all-purpose flour
1/2 teaspoon salt
2 1/2 teaspoons baking powder
1 cup raspberry jam

Preheat oven to 350 degrees . Double up large baking sheets (stack one inside the other). Line top baking sheet with parchment paper. In a food processor, blend the cream cheese layer ingredients to make a thick, smooth batter. Set aside. Do not clean food processor bowl. Add oil and butter, sugar, eggs, and extracts and blend well. Add almonds, flour, salt and baking powder and blend to make a thick batter. If batter is soft (it needs to be stiff) add more flour, a half cup at a time (you should not need more than 1 extra cup). on baking sheet make 2 logs of dough. Make a trough with your fingers, and pour in cream cheese mixture. Top with raspberry jam. Mush together by dragging some cookie batter over and around the other ingredients. Try your best to contain the wet stuff on top of the batter. Bake dough loaf until set and dry to the touch, 45 minutes. Cool loaf about 20 minutes and then cut into (about one inch wide). Return to baking sheet and reduce oven temperature to 325 degrees F. Bake cookies again to dry and crisp, 12-18 minutes.
Makes 2 - 3 dozen, depending on size, freezes well, until you find them and eat them all? (OK , I shared with Art)

Jake & Family 2008

My Baby's Babies..................................Jake , Stephanie, Shawn and Jamie. A beautiful family if Nonni says so herself! I am still laughing at Shawn saying "giggle giggle giggle" at Thanksgiving, and Jamie's stunning party dress! woohoo! The large photo looks much better on my Wall of fame, however I am so camera challenged that I couldnt shoot it well..so heres the little one:)

I am shooting off a letter to Olan Mills about smacking thier logo on my Grandbaby's face! ( oh, sorry, a little pissiness seeped through...scuse me....)

Letter to be CC'd to Moomphotography!..oh shoot G, stop!

I'm going to have a binding kind of morning, and a delivery kind of afternoon.....
:::::she made a list, alert the media:::::

I WILL LEAVE YOU WITH A FUNNY.

JAKE WOULD WEAR THIS ON A TEE SHIRT I'M SURE...LOL

Clouded Clarity

Its not in my coffee... no... I looked.. there are clouds in my clarity! Just when I think I have a grip on productivity, I cloud up again. Just when I think a decision has been made, I second guess it. JUST when I go to make a list an organize something, I wonder off taking trash out or sweeping an already swept floor. Its wonderful to be level headed for at least short intervals you know? I'm very upset at this person. I must have found another Sybil. I don't care for her at all. I much prefer the assertive, confident, and even demanding Sybil friend. Walking, talking and living WITH purpose. I have listed and weighed all reasons for funkiness, and threw it in the trash. Why?Because they are not acceptable to me. Sybil #1.

Even the holidays are clouded. I'm not feeling it. May be its a good thing that I'm not around the grands. I'm not wearing jingle bell socks or hiding presents or discussing them. Its December and I not only havent decorated, I dont even know where they are! Have you ever fought with yourself to SNAP OUT OF IT? Its a new one on me, for sure.

Its a darn good thing I am PANTO-ing up this week. I shudder to think what would happen too a custom job with this clouded clarity. I might mix a koi fish in with a sun bonnet sue or something! ACK! I have noticed something really cool. I am searching all the time for spare moments to piece my own quilts! Dragging out patterns, petting fabrics, organizing fat quarters! ( its a good thing too) ( anyone notice yet that I have Martha Stewart on the Telly? Every things a good thing, GRUNT) I have been playing with many Batiks too... Sharons new "Choose your own adventure" pattern lends itself well to a batik theme. I'll show ya the simplicity of it later. Hey I have a question.... When making many borders, un mitered borders, I was told to put on sides first, then hat and shoes ( top and bottom) I think it may have been Cherie Mieneke...Not sure.. But I dont know that it looks right? Can any of you confirm this for me? I have machine quilted a LOT more than I have pieced tops! All of my customers, well, most, miter all corners/borders. ( over achievers I say..lol)

I'm not a penguin. I mean they cute and all, full of love and all... FOR A SEASON! Thats all! I'm not a penguin. ( dont ask, I guess I just threw that in to throw u a curve...mental me)

Clarity is the property of being clear or transparent.
Clarity can refer to one's ability to clearly visualize an object or concept, as in thought, understanding, and the "mind's eye", as well as the traditional notion of visual perception, that is, with the actual eyes. Clarity may also refer more broadly to 'perspicacity', the Zen concept of 'no mind', or other terms denoting general clear and unperplexed cognition.

Ok, Now I REALLY have clouds in my clarity after reading the definition! Sheet! I want to say here and now that there is NO clear and unperplexed cognition round here! LOL I think this requires a stitch n bitch night. I need the WOMEN. I think I'll email them, send em an invite or something. Theres just something about machines humming, women laughing, music playing and food being passed that helps to solves all of lifes issues. Maybe it stems from childhood memories. (doesnt everything?) I remember being in my parents shop where all the seamstress worked. (motorcycle seats) I marvelled at all of the gossip and laughter. Sometimes if I sit still long enough, I can smell the shops air. Its filled with aromatic coffee, machine oil, leather, cigarettes, and perfume. I should tell you all about it one day! I wonder if Mom ever suffered from clouded clarity. I would ask her, but it would disturb her too much to see that I suffer. I'm gooing to go and attack that ambitious TO DO List over there.... yep.. thats where I'm headed.. wish me luck:)

I Like Cookies? - M & M's

I admit it. No, I love cookies. There. Its a weakness in times of trouble. Or in times of happiness. Maybe even in times of pondering, working, watching TV or computing with peoples in the box. I just love em. Now, admittedly I would rather have Blimas cookies, or even my own butter cookies, but when I am not cooking anymore, and Blimas cookies are all gone:::WAAAA:::: I have been known to hide a box of these in my basket at the store.

I have been trying to keep myself busy with things to do, people to see, and cookies to eat. Nope,, Did I just say that? sheesh... I would like to know why everyone around me is loosing weight at an alarming rate, and sending it all over to me!!! What? The cookies you say? grunt. Alas... I am my own worst enemy.

I had a nice time caring for Mom, and then a whirlwind valley trip for Thanksgiving. It was great, and I was thankful in the midst of pissedoff-edness for the past years events. I cooked, cleaned, visited, loved up on my kids/grands, had oodles of coffee with Heather and BA, we looked at homes, and even hit a new quilt shop in Oakdale.....and now I'm into the cookies again. I purposely took the remainder of Blimas raspberry biscotti to Kare Bears house so that I would STEP AWY FROM THEM.. and sure enough, poor Art is hooked on em too. Maybe I'll rent a room to a personal trainer and barter the rent...hmmmmmm

Maybe I'll tell Blima too "Ethel Up" and come back to take care of me...hmmmmmm But you know... these butter cookies are marvelous with SLO Morning Fog Lifter coffee!!! OMG AT NIGHT YOU SAY!!! Yes, I am the Cookie monster. grunt.

Today I made the Monday rounds picking up a few quilt tops and some yummy sale fabrics for UFO backings. You notice I dont join anyones stash busting clubs eh? Of course not. I just eat cookies. I think I am filled up now for every before Christmas slot there is. I could fit in a few more E2E tops.. send em over, I really want to help out the economy and shop. I tried a bit of that today too. My heart must not have been in it? I did a lot of "catch ~N~ release playing with the goods in the cart. ( I love that game)

For the first time in my young life I want to pass over Christmas. ( not to be confused with any other holiday, mind you) Marshalls blasted Christmas music, and I wasnt singing along. I looked around as if I had become annoyed. I had a mini meltdown in the mens department and decided that yes, I was annoyed. I left for Walmart, and cookies. You know how I just adore shopping right? Finding that perfect something for that perfect someone? Not here my friends...I lost it? What the heck? Where is it? Will it return? and WHO is this person anyway? I dont think we've met.

My sis and family are headed to Hawaii to "skip" Christmas. Good plan. If not for my kids/grands, I would book a trip to Mexico and do the same. Theres always next year... maybe. One would think anyway, but we never know do we? I wonder if they have good cookies?

I have been an absent blogger, I know. I'll try to be better. I just dont want to depress anyone...lol

Marvelous Mondays brings gratitudes a plenty, even from a stranger:)

* COOKIES

*loyal customers ( almost every week eh?)

* good friends ( that too)

* That popover Heather made

* Stability from all sorts of places

*my alternative down pillows! ( man u miss em when youre away!)

*Rondas poster, KEEP CALM & CARRY ON.