Wednesday, September 7, 2011

Bad Habits

"A bad habit never disappears miraculously; it's an undo-it-yourself project."
– Abigail Van Buren

Forgive me Dear Blog readers for I have sinned.
Now dont start emailing that I am making fun of this confession prayer. Im just writing a tell all Tuesday for ya.
I'm sorry that I have been away. I have been busy re adjusting. A.G.A.I. N.
My fAamily wonders why I hate doctor appointments. I tell them because its ALWAYS un nerving. Drama ensues each and every time. A few weeks ago, same thing as last years mammo scare. Only this time, I am not so fortunate. After my exam I was told that I now have Diabetes. I was listening to the good doctors words and looking in a side mirror at the same time. I saw my Mother. A.G.A.I. N.
While Diabetes is not a death sentence, it is a dibilitating disease that I DO NOT WISH TO DEAL WITH. It looks like I must. I am currently on an emotional roller coaster, determined to win, sad, resolute, pissed off, afraid, and about 10 other emotions thrown into the mix.
I have been on a mission to get better, get things accomplished, get better.... and now this. GRUNT. I know I allowed this to happen. I am not fooling myself. Maybe I thought I was exempt from such a fate. I mean come on... hasnt enough crap happened that I can have some good stuff happen now? I find it ironic that in the same week I had great news, I had this news just after. I am SO not calling bad things to happen! WTH? Ok, so... the resolute Sybil appears. I'm all over this. I will irraticate this from my life. Seven days of the perfect life change in food intake. Check. Excercise, not checked yet. I freaking hate excercise. My idea of good excercise is a couple good hours whirlling a cart around Costco. Grunt. But I will. I'm scouring Craigslist for a treadmill, and Ginger is pumped and ready to do Mommy battle. I need more battle buddies. Come walk your friend, K?
 I swore on myself that I would never suffer the pricking pain my Ma and Grandma did.. but I never DID anything to prevent it. Shame. I spoke to Ma about this. To Munz as well. To Walt, to Karebear, to friends, to all who will listen to me Kvetch. As I said, I go from being determined and strong, to planning my own funeral next to my boy. Its really NUTS I tell you. NUTS.
Okay, so as not to bore you, I will get back to my quilt. Which by the way is the ONLY thing keeping me together. A.G.A.I.N.
Thank God for quilting.
Wish me luck in this quest of mine dear blog readers. For you prayer warriors, please throw me on your list.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hi Gina
I also followed in my mom's footsteps and developed diabetes in my early 40's--nearly 20 years ago now! I'm still not taking care of myself well, but I do keep trying! My favourite exercise is water jogging in the pool. I do love the water! It's also easier on the joints! Do you have many public pools where you are? Because we're bloody cold and have such a short summer we do have many indoor public pools. You'll manage this Gina. It's not a death warrant--it's a warning warrant! Getter done!
Lurking Linda
stoleequilts@gmail.com

Rian said...

Diabetes isn't the end of the world. With a proper diet and exercise, you can live like anybody else and hardly know you have it. My mother had diabetes, my two sisters have it, and I am trying my darndest (so far so good) to avoid crossing over. Look also for an elliptical trainer while you're on Craigslist. Good luck.

Vicki W said...

Do you like to read? I absolutely HATE exercising too but I've been doing it regularly for 3 years now. The secret for me was a recumbent bike and quilting magazines. I think it's easiest to read on a recumbent bike, more than any other kind. Now I can only read my quilting magazines while biking. They come in the mail and go right to the table beside the bike. I also read books. I like a lot of non-fiction so I go to Barnes and Noble a d stock up in the bargain books section. I also exercise the very first thing in the morning to get it out of the way.
My current routine is to get out of bed and do some yoga stretches and then I head right for the bike. I read quilting magazines for the first 2 miles and then my book for 8 miles. I've even occasionally biked longer just because I like the book. If I don't do it first thing in the morning it never gets done.
Anyway, that's what works for me. You have to find a way to do it so that it's the least disruptive on your routine and it needs some sort of reward system. For me it's peace and quiet with a good book for 45 minutes.....and then I wake up! lol!

shirley said...

Ahhh....i wish we lived close to each other. we would walk together. currently i walk alone on the treadmill and it sucks. LOL i am on the brink of diabetes myself and battling weight. having gallbladder removal on monday. as we age the errors of our youth catch up with us. the trick is to keep fighting and don't give up. giving up junk food was the hardest for me. you'll win, Gina, keep fighting. hugs

Anonymous said...

Gina, I have read your blog for about a year now & I have admired your determination & hurt with you in all your heartaches. I am a nurse & woman who has also struggled with weight for the last 10 years or so. Last year I had a check up & wake up call with my cholesterol. I decided I would NOT go on medications for that & started walking & really being strict with a low fat diet. I lost 15 lbs & my cholesterol went down over 100pts! I have kept it up for over a year now & feel better than I have in years. Diabetes is a controllable disease. You can take control & you will be happy you did. I know from what you have already endured in your life you are a strong, wise woman & you will be able to do this. Will it be easy? NO, but life is not always easy, we know, right? But you can do it & you will feel better if & when you do. Try to do a little each day & it gets easier, becomes habit & then a way of life. Don't totally deny yourself from everything & reward yourself when you make a goal. Fabric is a good choice. Have faith & take care.
Jill
jmboettcher@charter.net

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